The Mammoth Adventure...in as much/little as I can tell

I've been putting off this story for a while because while I was there I was not in a very happy place, but I feel like now, after I've told enough people what happened I can share it... Here it goes:

I flew out of San Diego at 7:30am the day after the night performance. I landed in SJ airport at around 9 am and was picked up and put into a 152 plane and flown into Mammoth by 10:30. The whole way over I was stoked because it seemed like it would be something new and different and I would get to be networking with a bunch of amazing people from the east coast (the other students were coming from Julliard, Boston Conservatory, and Florida State).

So I flew in and tried to eat (remember I had been not feeling 100% in San Diego the day before, and plane rides always make me not hungry) and called my teacher (whose name I will omit) who was supposed to be picking me up. So the teacher came to get me... and I was a little nervous because he was not your most conventional looking guy. From behind the wheel of a big black excursion jumped a small toothpick of a man who, by the looks of his deep set wrinkles and smoker- cough, could very well have been the crypt keeper or every bad dream I had about death, incarnated. Nevertheless, the intensive had been going on for 2 weeks, so by noon we were driving back to the airport to say goodbye to Dave (who flew me there) and get my things.

As we drove back into town I was starting to get more excited, because teacher was talking about all the people he had gotten a chance to work with in New York. I felt like I was talking to my history book. Especially since the day I flew in was his 64th birthday. So after stopping at a small restaurant I finally inquired whom else I would be working with this next couple weeks, since we didn't seem to be in a hurry to get back to a group of other dancers...

"... You... you... you... and you... and two little girls they are 12 years old"

He proceeded to explain to me that out of his 12 dancers who were SUPPOSED to be there, 9 of them bailed (due to injuries or financial issues) and I was there with two 12 years olds... who were locals in MAmmoth..

At first I was stoked... I felt like Luke Skywalker going into meet Yoda and Study with a Jedi Master of dance, one on one.... or was that anxiety...?

"Let's get back in the car, I want you to read something..."

Ok, sure. I thought we might be going to a library because our conversation before I asked had a lot to do with the original labanotations of some of Harkins Ballet that existed on microfiche somewhere... maybe it was an article on the freshly deceased Pina Baush...

We drove to what I later learned is essentially Mammoth's Ghetto, maybe 3 complex's filled to the brim with Mexican families. It was not scary, just loud with lots of small children.

We walked up stairs to an apartment, which he later told me was his, without going in, he sat down and a table and motioned for me to sit down also, as he picked up 2 articles... one was the sheet, Mammoth's news paper, and the other was a californian newspaper. He pointed to the 2 articles he wanted me to read and unlocked the house.

... The first article was about California's financial crisis and how it is affecting mammoth... The second was an article about the man who I had been traveling with all day. Apparently, he was being charged with money embezzlement.

When I finished reading both articles he started talking about how he had been wrongly accused, however, mammoth was a small town, and the people pressing charges owned many things in the town: the studio we were to be working in, one of the pilates gyms... the motel I was SUPPOSED to be staying in.... So I sat there speechless, as he explained to me some nonsense about how "he had a commitment to me as a student" and (this is where my excitement turned to sheer panic) in order to make things work I would be staying there, with him.

Let's recap: I was too be staying, by myself, with the crypt-keeper, in the middle of mammoth's ghetto, in his one bedroom apartment.

Heck. No.

I felt so played, and never more alone in my life. I didn't want anyone to panic, because I was not technically in danger, and I was trying to think of all my options out. Once he left me to "settle in" I called in the most calm voice as possible and arranged an escape. So by the time my warden had returned I could tell him that I would not be staying. And by wednesday morning, I was back safely in a plane with Dave and my business partners.

It's not even worth writing about what I learned those 3 days. I had one on one training in ballet, ended up teaching and cleaning solos for the other girls, and slept with one eye opened every night, because "teacher" would roll himself a joint and get in his car to sleep under the stars (at my request) and I would be left to listen to fireworks all night in little mexico, CA. And when we weren't dancing, I was inhaling second hand smoke and listening to this yahoo name drop and complain about the american government.

But here I am, Safe and Sound, back and ready to take over the world, despite my 3 day set-back.

Tomorrow, an update on bringing dance to the bay area.

Almost 2 weeks of Catch- up!!

Hi readers!

So... I stopped blogging at the end of my San Diego trip because it was 1) becoming repetitive because of my dissatisfaction with the new works and 2) because I got sick with something I most likely gave myself (like an anxiety attack) either way, I had the spins for the duration of the program... and it was unfortunate because as an artist I think it is your job to create something new and exciting no matter what tools you get. For Example, my senior project was choreographed and set in about... 6-8 rehearsals... all of which were 2 hour rehearsals, but I almost NEVER used all 2 hours... which makes that project come together in essentially somewhere between 12 and 16 hours.... That is LESS than these choreographers got with us... and in many cases, I feel like these choreographers shorted us invention because they were pressed for time.

... No one is asking for an epic, 4 hour ballet... all art needs to do is evoke something that hopefully is exciting and maybe fun, at LEAST visually appealing... some of the choreography was a big flop and the excuse was because we were crunching time... I hope I never get to that point. I hope I am always inventing. DVD to follow.

I will post (soon) my thoughts on my mammoth adventure, (dance intensive: 2, adventure: 12) but get ready for a rant.

Currently I am working quickly to try and bring art to the Bay area. After my intensives have finished, this will be the newest thing to follow on the blog.

Signing off for now so I can work on the bay area take over! Stay Posted!

~Nat Q.

Living on a prayer.

Ok here's the update.
I always thought I just wanted to dance. For whoever, wherever, whatever. After doing this week, I know now this statement is false.

I hate technique classes that are only taught on the right side. That's not technique. I came to work, push me.

The new rep. Piece is, in my opinion, way better than last week's, but we'll see how the rest of the week goes, I still have 4 days. I was cast in the role that was originally played by a man, but they claim the dance is "gender neutral". On one side, this means they trust me to base for lifts. On the other, it means I have yet to play the part of the delicate female. Ever in life. Not that I want to be that ever, but i think to be versitile I need to be able to fake it, and it looks like I haven't fooled anyone yet.

I am still learning so much from the one new work about quality of movement. It's nice because the guy that teaches it reminds me of the teachers at home, without the favoritism bias. I am recievibg as much feedback as everyone else. And I felt really accomplished today when he said the duet I essentially made up myself was coming along. It should be cake by Saturday.

The part that is frustrating is still the piece at the end of the day. There is nothing even remotely interesting about it, and it kills me to know I was trained choreographically better. I'm not a moron, and while I get choreographing for a bunch of people in a week is a big risk, but guess what, we are trained. I stand in the rehearsal and think, doesn't he have any faith in my ability? Were we really that lame the first week that we are geting shit for steps now? It's making me question my ability as an artist.

So as I sink into my pillow, I can at least know I am geting strongr because my entire upper back muscles are fatigued, my sprained toe is just annoying, and I think the result of over compensation from my toe has resulted in a shin splint in my right leg.

... But if I weren't here, I'd be at home kicking myself for not taking a chance to learn.

And I'm super missing my roommates and friends. My new bf down here looks a lot like renae. Course, nothingnis as good as the original.

Dead tired. Quilici, out.

Chill out!

I have not meant to be neglagent, but when my routine ends, so does my blogging sometimes.

It was nice to have a weekend to clear my head and rest. Friday was spent after class at the shores for some snorkel time and than to fiesta island for some fireworks. The bat rays were out in full force in the cove, which was pretty cool, and seaworld has fireworks everynight from June to September, so that's cool. But after a full day of dance and half day of swimming, I was sacked out in no time. Good thing I had nothing to do on saturday because I was wiped out.

Saturday was A few errands and a lot of sun. We went back to the shores for some serious boogie boarding and football. The swimming was actually making my toe feel better too, to my surprise. Than we went to old towns, drank, and passed out. It was quite possibly a perfect day off.

I did some retail bonding with my sister. We learned very early that no one wants to shop with two sisters, because we pretty much have our own language. I really only do my serious shopping with other people, but so far my sister and jolie are my most trusted shopping therapists. Anyways, the hippie in me found great sandals in sun diego, sanuk brand. They are flip flop soles with canvas covers, and they are hand made, microfibered for durability, and the soles are made from yoga mat. And they are recycled materials. They are already super comfy, and I am highly supporting the brand starting now.

After the lazy day of shopping, laundry, and wii sports, I think I am ready to dive back in tomorrow. I think I have a shin splint also from all the walking this weekend, so when that heals I'll be even stronger. Woo.

On a side note, I am bringing jolie with me to new York. She sent me encouraging texts on Thursday and I almost cried. While I know there are always my dance girls for support, jolie continues to support me even while she is never fully sure what I am up to, and I don't tell people enough how grateful I am to have their support. And I truly think I would have given up by now if I were left to my own devices. And yet, it's Sunday, and my alarm is set for another day of floorburns and athletic tape...

Hand!

So I've benn slacking, whoops.

This have been getting progressively easier... Slowly but surely I am feeling better about things. I'm figuring out the people I have been trying to compare myself to are definitely older than I was assuming with way more experience. So I guess that made me feel better.

I'm definitely better at across the floor things because of heather's class, and I am also doing ok at reversing without running it. So grateful for that.

The newest challenge came with my new work challenge. It seemed so simple: take this phrase of movement it make it a duet.

What would have normally ben an easy task is now the puzzle of my life because 1 my partner has little to no contact/ partnering and 2 I know what the choreographer wants, but because of my partners discomfort and newness to partnering, things are going slowly while I do all the work, and feel like I am falling short when he comes to check our progress because the only person contributing to Our progress is me. So, thanks to Heather and Scott for giving me all the lifts I know.

The profound thought of the day came from Joe, the guy that had been providing all the rest of the incite seen here. He said: pay attention to hands. What could seem very gestural, could be so important with the right amount of contact and pressure. Don't make it decorative. Dance with your hands.

Light bulbs went on everywhere. The quality of movement changed dramatically with this concept in mind.

So, week one, check. And I went to the shores and chrissy and I had tons of food and bonfire and played in the waves. I was conked out til now! Chrissy comes home in 10, and than, off to the zoo!

Singing with your body and touching yourself.

... Yea, really.

So I was not sure how I was gonna do when I woke up and my toe was twice it's normal size and red, but I dragged myself to class anyways. I soon learned that we had a new teacher for technique for the rest of the week. Her name was Juliene and her training was in...

Grahm and limon technique

FIST PUMP!

So while I struggled through technique class ( my injury gave me no releve on my left foot) I was relieved I wasn't injured AND trying something new... Rep was... feeling academic. The steps weren't technically challenging, but the floor patterns are intricate, and the second you stop counting you might as well start over because it is impossible to not screw up the four other people you are working with from that point.

So after the morning was over I quickly ate and ran upstairs to the in house physical therapist ( every dancers dream). She examined my foot and quickly diagnosed it as a sprain and minor contusion. Whatever, dr lady, tape that shit up so I can get back to class!

So yesterday's fruastrating class became a "lightbulb on" class for me today. Yesterday, the combination was overwhelming and tricky and awful, but today after running through it, everything became clear! Joe was talking about contact yesterday and how you really had to "touch yourself" in order to make the movement work. When I actually did what he said today though, the dance ( movementily, if that is a word) makes sense because it's like the hand initiates the shoulder, hip, or joint it is in contact with. He must have said that at one point yesterday, but I was already so down on myself I must not have heard it. Joe seemed to be as pleased with my epiphany as me.

So I made it. The last work is not my favorite, but it feels like one of those pieces that us going to be tedious to learn, and when it's performed everyone will love it... What is it about those pieces anyways?

We even got out of tedious practice early so I could refill my antibiotics (long story, don't ask) and ice my foot. I think I can make it through the week, I'm going in early to get my foot liked at again tomorrow, when I went in this morning itbwas aggrivated and red and we couldn't tell if it was and infection from the floor burn, Or the angry toe... The redness is gone, no infection! Woo!

Made it over the hump. We'll see what limon brings me tomorrow! Chacon anyone?
~Nat Q.

I get knocked down

... Nothing good ever happens on tuesdays.

Seriously, Being the second at anything pretty much is lame (I would know as a second child). But today, tired and sore I dragged myself to class, and after a series of unfortunate events (kicked someone in the shoulder, possibly spraining my second and third toe, being told I was too strong for my own good, and being put into a chorus role in a new work) I became very frustrated with myself and began questioning myself. Here I was, finally out of my bay area bubble, and I am still being cast as the "smart" dancer. The one who knows all the counts, paid attention to details, and could probably clarify the path of the arm and it's motivation...

Unfortunately for me though, smart dancers are not featured dancers, or at least that is my observation.

I knew this to be familiar to other aspects of life... I have identified before with the size 6 trapped in a size 12 body, an artist trapped in a stalky body, a featured dancer trapped in a smart dancer body...

The best two things I learned today was from Joe, who is teaching the new rep piece. He said 1: the skin is not just part of your body. The concept, "I think, therefore I am" is bull. Your skin reacts and has thought too. Not cognative obviously, but it reacts to impulses and should not be thought of as a part of your body, but an extension of the brain. And if you don't believe that, put your hand on a hot stove and think it to stay there... You can't. The nerves in your skin tell you to move your hand...

Ping! A lightbulb went on in my head. So bright I felt I needed to share it.

Last and probably more important at the end of the day he looked around at our overwhelmed faces and reminded us that we came here to learn. Part of growing is being frustrated, and handling it, be it conquoring the obstacle, or some other creative option.

... Gr! He's right.

So, I'm taking it all back. With a negative attitude I won't get anywhere. And by subscribing to a label I've already lost the game.

So tomorrow, I'm taping my toes together, pulling myself up by the bra straps and dancing like me, the smartest featured dancer EVER!

... Tomorrow is a new day! I'll let you know how it goes.

After a therapudic swim with sis and watching best in show, I will put my pity hat away and take care of Wednesday!

Wish me luck!

~ Nat Q.

Day one: I gotta get through this

... And I did

... By the skin of my teeth:)

I got to San diego dance place and immediately fell in love! It is a 2 story building with beautiful facilities complete with locker rooms, studios with wall- to- wall marley floors (not being held together with tape, mind you), and really nice music equipment (all the speakers work, sjsu kids!)

So technique class was challenging and I was definitely being called out for running into everyone.. But it was feeling a little like heather's class at home so I was prepared and not discouraged!

Next we learned a section of the company's rep "love and murder" since there were so many of us we were going to be learning the film version... Not the stage version (the fact that they even have two versions and there was a distinct difference made me impressed!)

The people in the workshop with me are very committed to the workshop to. I was impressed at the amount of attentativeness and effort put into learning the rep, from the ad who has a striking resemblence of Adam shankman.

After a quick break i learned a little more about the studios I was dancing in, and San diego dance scene on a whole ( but I will report on that later on the week as I learn more)

When we moved into new work I started to get more challenged. The choreographer was a guest, a six foot three inches guy that was... In love with the floor. So I made every attempt to move like him as my short stalky body would allow. My butt had been kicked thoroughly. and it was one of those "go when you think the music is telling you to" pieces with lots of chaos on the first day. So that's when I started feeling the burn!

So far so good! I am now waiting at home for Chris so I can eat some nom noms, maybe play some wii, and wait for the sore to set in. I can already tell tomorrow might be more difficult now that I know what to expect... And the second day sore will be settled in... Yipes!

Here I go again on my own!

Well, I had a few set backs, but I have finally arrived! After taking Georgia, my trusty jeep/hover craft over the grape vine and into San diego, I met my sister for dinner, smores, and fireworks! It was a long day and I was not 100% yet from my little 4th of July morning mishap, so I packed my lunch and hit it early in attempts to make it through my first day...

How do you measure a month in the life?

... and more importantly, How do you pack for that?

I have yet to find out the answer... and yet I did. I packed... for every senario I could have played out in my head. I am still uncertain of what I will ned but so Far I have:

1) a carry on with the entire contents of my dance clothes...
2) a day bag for sd, and
3) a day bag with all of my "adventure gear" and essential liquids that would not make it back on a plane for mammoth (to be given to Dave before leaving for SD)

I'm ho[ing to not pack the entire car with frivilous things... but I can't help[ but wonder if I am ready, or if there is a way to fully be prepared.