It's kinda ridiculous how quickly things snowball.
I have been thinking about this blog since wednesday, and I know if I don't write it right this second I am going to let a week go by, and I just can't let that happen.
This week I started waking up with headaches again because I have been grinding my teeth again (a sign of my own stress levels) but to be honest I haven't been happier since I quit school.
The teeth grinding started almost 4 years ago, when I was working a million jobs, going to school full time, and heavily involved in church. I thought I had a brain tumor and was going to die when I went to the doctor. Stick out your tongue, he said. And when I did he immediately laughed and told me to see my dentist (apparently, when I opened my mouth there were signs on my back teeth of grinding... pretty gross huh?)
The silly part is that I am not truly happy until I am so stressed out with a full schedule that I am grinding my teeth. This week was full of staff meetings, networking for new dance things in San Jose, and other creative endeavors that I will talk more about once they get closer. But, on a whole, I am super stoked with what lies ahead.
On the blogging front, I have some super exciting news.
A Year ago I called my dad after a big career meltdown telling him I needed help finding a job. "What do you want to do?" asks dad. "I don't know", I replied! The answer from dad was so irritatingly easy I was angry I hadn't thought of it myself.
"Well, what would you do for free? That's what you SHOULD be doing. If you would do it for free, find someone who will pay you to do it... and that is your answer..."
This was long before I started blogging regularly, but the answer was definitely in my head... What would I do for free:
1)dance
2) write
3) sleep
Yea, right dad, like it's that easy. Well, 3 months later I was teaching dance and in a company in SF. And now, starting Sunday, I will officially be a paid blogger. That's right, readers! Number two of three has happened. Because I am still working out the kinks, I cannot give out the link today of the new blog, but just know, it's gonna be awesome! And I will still be writing here as promised, but it is official, and as much as I hate saying it: Dad was right. I was even leaving work the other day prepping for my big new project, and said to my friend/ collaborator "So this is it? I am officially a blogger now?" and she said back to me "Oh Natalie, you have ALWAYS been a writer" which pretty much made my day.
Dad says live the life you love... Now who wants to hire me to sleep and bake? I'll send you my resume right now :)
About Me
- Captain Q.
- I am who I am. Love it or hate it, I only change for me, for self improvement, and Self-assurance.
Friday, February 4, 2011
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Shut it and Serve: The end of the week thoughts
I have often tried to figure out what makes a well-rounded person.
I know, it sounds ridiculous, but my parents spent many hours and dollars, shoving my sister, brother and I out of so many extra curricular activities that people are AMAZED at how many different instruments, sports, and other random skills I have (Karate, anyone?) This isn't the point. When on our way to and from this multitude of education, we often whined in the back seat WHY? Why mom, why do I have to sit in the back seat with my dumb sister and take piano between girl scouts and softball? All my friends are at home watching Real World. Well, my mother would look into her rearview mirror and explain that we must try everything, even if it is just once, because this will help us to be well-rounded individuals. We were, at almost all times, enrolled in a sport, instrument, and community organization of some form or another until we were old enough to refuse and pick one: my sister in sports, myself in Performing arts, and my brother in music.
Is this what makes a good well-rounded person? While this very well may be a start, i feel as though i have had some insight tonight to the other piece of the puzzle. Tonight i attended a launch party for San Jose's chamber of Commerce field guide to service. The guest speaker, so charming and bubbly had a lot of good things to say about community and san jose as a whole, but she had an analogy that i wished painted a clear picture for me about. While she had a lot to say that I took away with me tonight, her analogy was, "sometimes, when I walk my dog, I bring an extra bag with me and pick up a bag of garbage. Will that end world hunger? No, but I am hoping to do my part, and maybe inspire others to do their part...."
It was in that moment that I really think I found a solution: Service. Here's why: I have a group of friends, my age and a few older, ok, they are mostly older but not by much. and male.... and pilots, and they have a PASSION for crabbing about the state of the union.
Now, my mother might argue that they have a right to crab because they voted, but if there is a group of us younger americans that are skeptical and believe that the system is flawed... And in my own logic, and experience in working in groups, and the interest of cliches.... "if you want something done, you have to do it yourself"...
So what is my conclusion. It is obvious to ME that my system is flawed, but these bunch of nay-sayers who I love are missing the key ingredient: service. While you may work in a job that serves (pilots, teachers, etc.) that is just never enough! And, since I was raised in a very BUSY household (see extra- curriculars above), it does not make sense to sit and gripe.... at what point do we turn our distresses into action? and who will do it? If your answer to that question is "Not I" then I'm sorry, you have revolked all your rights to useless crabbing. Voting is not enough anymore. Action is the new bitching, because if you are going to sit and cry about it the way generations before us did... well then, you are going to end up with well, what we have now, which is obviously not ideal.
I have worked many odd jobs, from teaching and TA-ing, to backbar, event planning and catering, but the one common theme is that they have all, in some way, been a job of service, giving back and people oriented. And, while I am fairly new at this "no school to consume my whole life thing", I can honestly say that some of the most deep and meaningful friendships I have made have been with people working towards a common goal.
If you need help finding I place that needs your help, and sparks your interest, I can now help you find a place. And no more complaining. Anne Frank wrote, "How wonderful is it that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world." Mother Theresa said "If you can't feed 100 people, feed one." Michael Jackson said "If you wanna make the world a better place take a look at yourself and make the change."
I hope we can all continue to round ourselves out.
I know, it sounds ridiculous, but my parents spent many hours and dollars, shoving my sister, brother and I out of so many extra curricular activities that people are AMAZED at how many different instruments, sports, and other random skills I have (Karate, anyone?) This isn't the point. When on our way to and from this multitude of education, we often whined in the back seat WHY? Why mom, why do I have to sit in the back seat with my dumb sister and take piano between girl scouts and softball? All my friends are at home watching Real World. Well, my mother would look into her rearview mirror and explain that we must try everything, even if it is just once, because this will help us to be well-rounded individuals. We were, at almost all times, enrolled in a sport, instrument, and community organization of some form or another until we were old enough to refuse and pick one: my sister in sports, myself in Performing arts, and my brother in music.
Is this what makes a good well-rounded person? While this very well may be a start, i feel as though i have had some insight tonight to the other piece of the puzzle. Tonight i attended a launch party for San Jose's chamber of Commerce field guide to service. The guest speaker, so charming and bubbly had a lot of good things to say about community and san jose as a whole, but she had an analogy that i wished painted a clear picture for me about. While she had a lot to say that I took away with me tonight, her analogy was, "sometimes, when I walk my dog, I bring an extra bag with me and pick up a bag of garbage. Will that end world hunger? No, but I am hoping to do my part, and maybe inspire others to do their part...."
It was in that moment that I really think I found a solution: Service. Here's why: I have a group of friends, my age and a few older, ok, they are mostly older but not by much. and male.... and pilots, and they have a PASSION for crabbing about the state of the union.
Now, my mother might argue that they have a right to crab because they voted, but if there is a group of us younger americans that are skeptical and believe that the system is flawed... And in my own logic, and experience in working in groups, and the interest of cliches.... "if you want something done, you have to do it yourself"...
So what is my conclusion. It is obvious to ME that my system is flawed, but these bunch of nay-sayers who I love are missing the key ingredient: service. While you may work in a job that serves (pilots, teachers, etc.) that is just never enough! And, since I was raised in a very BUSY household (see extra- curriculars above), it does not make sense to sit and gripe.... at what point do we turn our distresses into action? and who will do it? If your answer to that question is "Not I" then I'm sorry, you have revolked all your rights to useless crabbing. Voting is not enough anymore. Action is the new bitching, because if you are going to sit and cry about it the way generations before us did... well then, you are going to end up with well, what we have now, which is obviously not ideal.
I have worked many odd jobs, from teaching and TA-ing, to backbar, event planning and catering, but the one common theme is that they have all, in some way, been a job of service, giving back and people oriented. And, while I am fairly new at this "no school to consume my whole life thing", I can honestly say that some of the most deep and meaningful friendships I have made have been with people working towards a common goal.
If you need help finding I place that needs your help, and sparks your interest, I can now help you find a place. And no more complaining. Anne Frank wrote, "How wonderful is it that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world." Mother Theresa said "If you can't feed 100 people, feed one." Michael Jackson said "If you wanna make the world a better place take a look at yourself and make the change."
I hope we can all continue to round ourselves out.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Resolutions, promises, and adventures
I Resolved to write once a week in my blog: BROKEN. No matter how hard I try, sometimes I have low points. I don't Just mean a typical gloomy day.
I had a communication teacher once tell me emotions are like a pendulum. The harder you love, laugh, and smile, the inverse is true also. So, while I mostly am in a secure spot of comfort and stability (one year later, if you read last years posts...) There are still days, no, minutes, where I throw myself onto the floor, question all my life's choices, and cry. UGLY cry. To the point where I see on my roommate or boyfriends face (depending on what venue I have selected for these theatrics) looks at me as if I am insane, and then steps over me and waits patiently for me to finish. As I write this, I can almost hear my dad chuckling, because these fits have not changed at all since I was a terrible 2, 13, or 18.
But it's true, and when I think my updates are going to sound like a self-loathing baby, I refrain. But. No more excuses, One update a week. AT least! FOR REAL THIS TIME.
I have also been reflecting a lot about the rest of my life. While I was soooo busy over the holiday I never blogged (oops!) I found myself more happy then I have been in quite sometime.
I have been drawn back to the blog for one reason in particular today: Documentation. and REAL accountability.
My roommate and I have been living together now for 6 years. Every year we say we are going to climb half dome, since I could remember... and it has YET to happen. For no good reason at all we say we will do it in summer every year, and every year we get to our holiday that we made up (yes... we made up a holiday, we are that awesome. We are SO cool that not only did we make it up, but someone later tried to steal it and miserably failed, but that is a different story...) and say, "Oh no! We did everything EXCEPT that yosemite thing"
While I KNOW we can do it, I feel there is a certain amount of training that goes into the hike if you want to enjoy it. Anyone can hike it, yes, but it is a long drive from Yosemite back to San Jose, and the less amount of pain I can be in, the better. So we have started our prep. And this year, we are going to do it!
For christmas this year Roommate gave me a new book... 60 hikes in 60 miles. It is, as it suggests, 60 parks and trails in a 60 mile radius of my house. The challenge is this: Commit to one a month (probably more as we get closer to a date) and hike the trail.
We are thinking if we go in august, that is 8 hikes: 2 easy, 4 moderate, 2 hard... minimum. Our first hike got us pretty excited, and we know have a running list of supplies we need, maps, and pictures.
The one thing I will say about our first hike (almost 2 weeks ago) was I got lucky. Not only does our book accurately navigate the trail, but San Jose is one of the only places I think you can drive 15 miles out of civilization and be passing a swedish commune and next to a waterfall. I am stoked to reflect, share, and invite anyone out their on the journey that will become Yosemite 2011
I had a communication teacher once tell me emotions are like a pendulum. The harder you love, laugh, and smile, the inverse is true also. So, while I mostly am in a secure spot of comfort and stability (one year later, if you read last years posts...) There are still days, no, minutes, where I throw myself onto the floor, question all my life's choices, and cry. UGLY cry. To the point where I see on my roommate or boyfriends face (depending on what venue I have selected for these theatrics) looks at me as if I am insane, and then steps over me and waits patiently for me to finish. As I write this, I can almost hear my dad chuckling, because these fits have not changed at all since I was a terrible 2, 13, or 18.
But it's true, and when I think my updates are going to sound like a self-loathing baby, I refrain. But. No more excuses, One update a week. AT least! FOR REAL THIS TIME.
I have also been reflecting a lot about the rest of my life. While I was soooo busy over the holiday I never blogged (oops!) I found myself more happy then I have been in quite sometime.
I have been drawn back to the blog for one reason in particular today: Documentation. and REAL accountability.
My roommate and I have been living together now for 6 years. Every year we say we are going to climb half dome, since I could remember... and it has YET to happen. For no good reason at all we say we will do it in summer every year, and every year we get to our holiday that we made up (yes... we made up a holiday, we are that awesome. We are SO cool that not only did we make it up, but someone later tried to steal it and miserably failed, but that is a different story...) and say, "Oh no! We did everything EXCEPT that yosemite thing"
While I KNOW we can do it, I feel there is a certain amount of training that goes into the hike if you want to enjoy it. Anyone can hike it, yes, but it is a long drive from Yosemite back to San Jose, and the less amount of pain I can be in, the better. So we have started our prep. And this year, we are going to do it!
For christmas this year Roommate gave me a new book... 60 hikes in 60 miles. It is, as it suggests, 60 parks and trails in a 60 mile radius of my house. The challenge is this: Commit to one a month (probably more as we get closer to a date) and hike the trail.
We are thinking if we go in august, that is 8 hikes: 2 easy, 4 moderate, 2 hard... minimum. Our first hike got us pretty excited, and we know have a running list of supplies we need, maps, and pictures.
The one thing I will say about our first hike (almost 2 weeks ago) was I got lucky. Not only does our book accurately navigate the trail, but San Jose is one of the only places I think you can drive 15 miles out of civilization and be passing a swedish commune and next to a waterfall. I am stoked to reflect, share, and invite anyone out their on the journey that will become Yosemite 2011
Thursday, September 30, 2010
The most wonderful time of the YEAR and my grandfather, Patrick Stewart
The time is now, Friends.
If you are a regular reader of this blog, you know how I feel about habits... I have continued to stress about needing habit, floundered around the past year of being out of school, and been asking myself what the HECK am I going to do with myself in these next years? What Am I going to do with my life in order bring Dance and art back into the south bay.
And while I can sit here and stress, I like to stop and savor the few things I know to be fact:
1) The sun Rises in the east and sets in the west
2) Gary Masters Willl ALWAYS hold class
3) When the leaves change colors, Apple Hill will ALWAYS be a drive away.
For those of you who don't know, Gary Masters is a mentor of mine for college. The joke is that every other teacher at LEAST once a semester would inevitably cancel class for one reason or another, except Gary. One semester his company was performing and more than half of the faculty was out because they were all in his show. Not Gary, I banked on the fact that he would be there, and when to his surprise I dropped in on an early morning class I shared with him what I knew about the sun and how he would always have class. He sorta rolled his eyes at me, but I could see his smug look on his face when he walked away.
... I should find out when his classes are this semester.
More personally, If you don;t know what apple hill is, you should. One of Northern California's best kept secrets is east of sacramento, and the memories I have of it are that of normal children to Disneyland. My Papa lived in the mountains in colfax, and every year in october for the family Birthdays (and papa's birthday too), we would make the drive to Apple Hill. And every year when the colors start to change, I start to itch waiting for the weekend I can sneak up the hill for a fresh carmel apple and a pound of honey in celebration of one of my favorite seasons.
My papa, a legend in his own right, was another great contribution to me. A combination of popeye and captain Crunch, Yuel Brenner and Patrick Stewart, My grandfather the ex marine could have made me famous for his one liners, a la "Shit my dad says". But more importantly are his spunk, no nonsense attitude, and harsh realities that Keeps him in the front of my brain these past few days.
In my life of recent insecurities, I have found that I always have my biggest support system with me all the time... In the changing colors of the leaves, in the sunrise through my window in the morning, in the first bite of a crisp, fresh october apple. And even on my crappiest days, in my darkest hours, I can hear "mississippi mud" in my head, and a small weight gets lifted off my Heart.
And I'm counting down the month til I get to return to Apple Hill!
If you are a regular reader of this blog, you know how I feel about habits... I have continued to stress about needing habit, floundered around the past year of being out of school, and been asking myself what the HECK am I going to do with myself in these next years? What Am I going to do with my life in order bring Dance and art back into the south bay.
And while I can sit here and stress, I like to stop and savor the few things I know to be fact:
1) The sun Rises in the east and sets in the west
2) Gary Masters Willl ALWAYS hold class
3) When the leaves change colors, Apple Hill will ALWAYS be a drive away.
For those of you who don't know, Gary Masters is a mentor of mine for college. The joke is that every other teacher at LEAST once a semester would inevitably cancel class for one reason or another, except Gary. One semester his company was performing and more than half of the faculty was out because they were all in his show. Not Gary, I banked on the fact that he would be there, and when to his surprise I dropped in on an early morning class I shared with him what I knew about the sun and how he would always have class. He sorta rolled his eyes at me, but I could see his smug look on his face when he walked away.
... I should find out when his classes are this semester.
More personally, If you don;t know what apple hill is, you should. One of Northern California's best kept secrets is east of sacramento, and the memories I have of it are that of normal children to Disneyland. My Papa lived in the mountains in colfax, and every year in october for the family Birthdays (and papa's birthday too), we would make the drive to Apple Hill. And every year when the colors start to change, I start to itch waiting for the weekend I can sneak up the hill for a fresh carmel apple and a pound of honey in celebration of one of my favorite seasons.
My papa, a legend in his own right, was another great contribution to me. A combination of popeye and captain Crunch, Yuel Brenner and Patrick Stewart, My grandfather the ex marine could have made me famous for his one liners, a la "Shit my dad says". But more importantly are his spunk, no nonsense attitude, and harsh realities that Keeps him in the front of my brain these past few days.
In my life of recent insecurities, I have found that I always have my biggest support system with me all the time... In the changing colors of the leaves, in the sunrise through my window in the morning, in the first bite of a crisp, fresh october apple. And even on my crappiest days, in my darkest hours, I can hear "mississippi mud" in my head, and a small weight gets lifted off my Heart.
And I'm counting down the month til I get to return to Apple Hill!
Sunday, September 5, 2010
A final Plea: why you need to donate to Dance in Transit
I am in my last hours before dance in transit the fundraiser on kickstarter closes. I have yet to make my goal and think/KNOW that if only people KNEW how important this kind of event was, they would give. So this is it, my final plea: I am about to give you THREE huge reasons why not just you, but EVERYONE you know, should be donating to dance in transit.
First of all, have you read the news lately? Times are tough. And that is the BEST way to say it. The economy is down, there are doubts about our leaders, and lots of rules and regulations either passed or in progress do not make sense to the masses. ITs rough. It is time to take a stance and have a voice.
If you look at the past, (because history tends to repeat itself), some of the greatest pieces of art, dance, and music, have come from the crappiest parts of history. Have you ever HEARD gospel music? Its roots come from years of struggling and slavery, and the sound moves a soul to a place of goosebumps and tears? Jazz? Same thing. and more IMPORTANTLY than that, artist have often been the only ones brave enough to say what the REST of society is thinking. By you donating, you are not only saying, "Yes, art is important," but you are saying "I have a voice, I care about this community, and I support it." You are giving life to a creative self expression.
Secondly, this may not be a good enough reason for you. You might say "I have a voice, I vote." and good for you... BUT as we all know sometimes that isn't enough. And I wish I could tell you the power of dance, or ANY art for that matter, but I can't. I can't take all of you into my classroom of 90% "at risk" students and show you how a semester of hip hop brought them closer. I can't show you the kids who were labeled "Troubled" or "not smart" in my classes expressing themselves in ways that they could never do before I offered to teach there. But it happened, and you have to believe me when I say that dance incorporates all the important components of being a well rounded human. It teaches you to think outside the box. It teaches you to think on your feet. It teaches you that there are other ways to express yourselves then throwing rocks and sticks, or verbally abusing someone because you are having a bad day. It teaches people to work as a team, individually, and come together to produce something great. For a cause much higher then themselves. By stifling these programs, we are not a part of the solution. And it looks to me so far that, we could use some new solutions. I'm not saying Dance is the answer, but it certainly helps.
Now, Lastly... I find it hard/ sad to have even needed to write this much about Dance in transit. The truth is, I shouldn't have to. Of course I need to sell people on a business idea, but I have written countless press releases, multiple statements, and if you are taking the time to read this, chances are my job has already been done for the most part. When I first graduated, I wanted to go to New york. But that dream became less and less appealing when I thought about why I thought I needed to go there. San Jose is the 10th largest city in the nation. It is my home that I LOVE IT. And I know if you are reading this you probably live here and also love it. And if that is the case, you are also probably making money doing some form of career. And getting paid for it. Well, I want that too. I want to be able to wake up in the city I love and be paid for my skill set, Just like everyone else. Sure, I could move to New york or San Francisco, but I shouldn't have to. San Jose is already claiming to be so advanced in its politics, technology and business.... why can't we just be advanced in our art scene too?
... That's where you come in.
Dance in Transit helps with all these things. It nurtures dance in a community that doesn't NEED it, but DESERVES it. It gives San Jose a spot on the map in yet another field, rounding out the community, giving an outlet for performers that are ALREADY are in existence, and shows the next generation of artists that it we DO love them and we DON't want them to go to those other cities because ours is just as cool.
It could be great. It could be really great. And really awesome OTHER things could come out of it. But if I don't make this goal, I personally can't continue to create this venue as quickly...
..... So won't you PLEASE donate to Dance in Transit?
http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/316656906/dance-in-transit-an-outdoor-site-specific-dance-fe
First of all, have you read the news lately? Times are tough. And that is the BEST way to say it. The economy is down, there are doubts about our leaders, and lots of rules and regulations either passed or in progress do not make sense to the masses. ITs rough. It is time to take a stance and have a voice.
If you look at the past, (because history tends to repeat itself), some of the greatest pieces of art, dance, and music, have come from the crappiest parts of history. Have you ever HEARD gospel music? Its roots come from years of struggling and slavery, and the sound moves a soul to a place of goosebumps and tears? Jazz? Same thing. and more IMPORTANTLY than that, artist have often been the only ones brave enough to say what the REST of society is thinking. By you donating, you are not only saying, "Yes, art is important," but you are saying "I have a voice, I care about this community, and I support it." You are giving life to a creative self expression.
Secondly, this may not be a good enough reason for you. You might say "I have a voice, I vote." and good for you... BUT as we all know sometimes that isn't enough. And I wish I could tell you the power of dance, or ANY art for that matter, but I can't. I can't take all of you into my classroom of 90% "at risk" students and show you how a semester of hip hop brought them closer. I can't show you the kids who were labeled "Troubled" or "not smart" in my classes expressing themselves in ways that they could never do before I offered to teach there. But it happened, and you have to believe me when I say that dance incorporates all the important components of being a well rounded human. It teaches you to think outside the box. It teaches you to think on your feet. It teaches you that there are other ways to express yourselves then throwing rocks and sticks, or verbally abusing someone because you are having a bad day. It teaches people to work as a team, individually, and come together to produce something great. For a cause much higher then themselves. By stifling these programs, we are not a part of the solution. And it looks to me so far that, we could use some new solutions. I'm not saying Dance is the answer, but it certainly helps.
Now, Lastly... I find it hard/ sad to have even needed to write this much about Dance in transit. The truth is, I shouldn't have to. Of course I need to sell people on a business idea, but I have written countless press releases, multiple statements, and if you are taking the time to read this, chances are my job has already been done for the most part. When I first graduated, I wanted to go to New york. But that dream became less and less appealing when I thought about why I thought I needed to go there. San Jose is the 10th largest city in the nation. It is my home that I LOVE IT. And I know if you are reading this you probably live here and also love it. And if that is the case, you are also probably making money doing some form of career. And getting paid for it. Well, I want that too. I want to be able to wake up in the city I love and be paid for my skill set, Just like everyone else. Sure, I could move to New york or San Francisco, but I shouldn't have to. San Jose is already claiming to be so advanced in its politics, technology and business.... why can't we just be advanced in our art scene too?
... That's where you come in.
Dance in Transit helps with all these things. It nurtures dance in a community that doesn't NEED it, but DESERVES it. It gives San Jose a spot on the map in yet another field, rounding out the community, giving an outlet for performers that are ALREADY are in existence, and shows the next generation of artists that it we DO love them and we DON't want them to go to those other cities because ours is just as cool.
It could be great. It could be really great. And really awesome OTHER things could come out of it. But if I don't make this goal, I personally can't continue to create this venue as quickly...
..... So won't you PLEASE donate to Dance in Transit?
http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/316656906/dance-in-transit-an-outdoor-site-specific-dance-fe
Monday, August 30, 2010
High maintenance friend, moi
I do not claim to be low maintenance in the least.
In fact I often joke with my boyfriend that he will try and get rid of me as soon as he realizes HOW high maintenance I actually am... This of course, is funny because he knew me BEFORE we started dating me, and Still thinks I am fantastic (for some reason even I cannot explain). What I think is funny is when people (girls in particular) cannot, as I call "identify the crazy". And for this I repeatedly apologize to my man friends, who are now under the impression I am LESS Looney because I do not think I am always right, and have an ability to identify the crazy?
What does this mean? Well, I am on the last few days of my alcoholic abstinence, I can sum up a few things: 1) giving up alcohol saves you money, but not necessarily weight (depending on what you use to substitute your drink... in my case, pretzel M&M's) 2) If you choose not to drink when you go out, the social aspect of it is all in your head. I went out to bars on many occassions during this project, and ordered a diet coke... No one cared. It was when I DIDN't have anything in my hand that people would make a fuss. I think the point is, when someone walks into your house, you offer them a drink (water or otherwise), if you are at a restaurant, you get water... if you are in a bar cupless, it doesn't matter if you are drinking white lightening or water, your company just wants you to be comfortable (which apparently equates to hydrated... who knew?)
And as a side note, I am going to be meditating the next few days (til friday) on what my next month long project will be, and if I will start it in September, or if I will wait til october when Dance in Transit has passed. I have been thinking of a few different ideas, and here are the ones I have liked the most:
1) Run once a day for the next two months (in prep for a mud race I might be running at the end of Oct.)
2) Take a picture everyday for one month (this will MAKE me post daily, and also force me to get a new Camera)
3) Wear one band t-shirt a day for a whole month (thinking this may be better for october)
4) Talk to one new person a day (forcing me to get out from behind the computer)
Of course all weigh ins are welcomed, and while I am hoping to post before I do take on another endeavor, I feel it is only appropriate to talk about the glassware...
My father tells this story at almost any dinner party (or at least he used to) and this year for my birthday I passed it onto a select few who came to celebrate with me. In the days of Kings and Queens, before a meal was ate, the king would pour his beverage into the glass of the man on his right, and that man would pass it to his right, until the beverage had made it all the way around the table. This practice was a ritual to take precaution in case someone might have tried to poison the king, they would also be poisoning the entire court. The clinking of glasses happens now, because this is the sound the glasses made when the drink was being poured from glass to glass now. We cheers to our health, our family, and the loyalty of our friends who would drink from your same cup, with you in your homes.
While I recognize to be high maintenance, I cheers to my loyal readers who I am flattered even continue to support and hate on everything I do. I wouldn't be doing my job correctly if I weren't stirring up some emotion, be it wanting to see James bond on cinema, or running to tell my grandmother I am obsessed with liquor... either way I have charmed or disgusted my way into your brains!
Salute!
Thursday, August 26, 2010
One Bourbon, Scotch, and Beer
Life is about choices... I've been told.
Recently, I have not been good with those. Specifically, the fact that I get crazy after drinking one cup of coffee, and I have just now ordered a HUGE Philz Mint Mojito, which is promising to keep me up til tuesday (I have drink 3/4's of it, and am already in panic mode... That's what happens when I drink coffee)
I woke up to a sun shiny, day, singing a catchy little tune in my head, got half way through my coffee, and all of a sudden my brain went....
HOLY COW, NAT Q!!!!! YOU ARE 2GRAND IN THE HOLE AND THREE WEEKS FROM THE BIGGEST EVENT OF YOUR CAREER.
Isn't it funny how caffine effects people?
I have been told faith is a hundred percent trust and surrender. I didn't invest this money thinking I wouldn't make it back (PEople DO care about the arts, I know... They just don't know it yet I feel.) The thing of it is, is that it is defined in so many ways.
Think about Apple. Why are they so successful? They are Creative with their ads, products, and continue to push the envelope... ALWAYS. People thinks Steve Jobs is crazy and his products are mindblowing....
THAT IS ART, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!
While you think that silly brain in your hand that you HAVE to have the latest version of is an iphone and pioneering technology, It has take years of testing creative solving, and aesthetics to get it just perfect so it fits conveniently into your back pocket... It's a work of art.
Back to analogies. I have always had issues with trust (I think starting when I had a bad boyfriend experience at 16), and so it is really hard for me to surrender the idea that I will infact, meet my fundraising goal (and surpass it in 12 days). Trust is knowing your car headlight only shine 200 feet in front of you, and yet you drive 50 miles from SF to SJ at 10 at night... I make this drive twice a week at least.
"But Nat Q, you know that this works because you can also see the lights of people in front of you on your journey with you."
Well, that i the trust part. I have seen other pioneers, Martha, Twyla, I would even say Brenda Way, KT Nelson, Tawnya, and Gary are pioneers. I can see those headlights, I just gotta pace myself so they don't fall out of sight?
What does the title have to do with this post? because I have been true to my word, No alcohol for the past 26 days, but after the coffee, I am ready for all three of these, Just like George... But not quite
Speaking of choices, The last time I had my own rendition of a BSB, I did not make good choices (I was 22) And here is that recipie... I think it's called a skittle... Please drink with caution...
(And if you want to help donate to DIT, just click the link on the side of my blog... please?)
Skittle mixed drink
3 count Raspberry Vodka
3 count Sierra Mist
1 count Orange Liquor
In that order, Serve over ice... Taste the rainbow.
ALSO: New friends (sorta) I love photos, and I had the pleasure of working with a fellow blogger recently... She takes GORGEOUS picture... and this is the link to her website! Happy browsing!
http://chubbphotos.blogspot.com/2010/08/natalie-q.html#comment-form
Recently, I have not been good with those. Specifically, the fact that I get crazy after drinking one cup of coffee, and I have just now ordered a HUGE Philz Mint Mojito, which is promising to keep me up til tuesday (I have drink 3/4's of it, and am already in panic mode... That's what happens when I drink coffee)
I woke up to a sun shiny, day, singing a catchy little tune in my head, got half way through my coffee, and all of a sudden my brain went....
HOLY COW, NAT Q!!!!! YOU ARE 2GRAND IN THE HOLE AND THREE WEEKS FROM THE BIGGEST EVENT OF YOUR CAREER.
Isn't it funny how caffine effects people?
I have been told faith is a hundred percent trust and surrender. I didn't invest this money thinking I wouldn't make it back (PEople DO care about the arts, I know... They just don't know it yet I feel.) The thing of it is, is that it is defined in so many ways.
Think about Apple. Why are they so successful? They are Creative with their ads, products, and continue to push the envelope... ALWAYS. People thinks Steve Jobs is crazy and his products are mindblowing....
THAT IS ART, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!
While you think that silly brain in your hand that you HAVE to have the latest version of is an iphone and pioneering technology, It has take years of testing creative solving, and aesthetics to get it just perfect so it fits conveniently into your back pocket... It's a work of art.
Back to analogies. I have always had issues with trust (I think starting when I had a bad boyfriend experience at 16), and so it is really hard for me to surrender the idea that I will infact, meet my fundraising goal (and surpass it in 12 days). Trust is knowing your car headlight only shine 200 feet in front of you, and yet you drive 50 miles from SF to SJ at 10 at night... I make this drive twice a week at least.
"But Nat Q, you know that this works because you can also see the lights of people in front of you on your journey with you."
Well, that i the trust part. I have seen other pioneers, Martha, Twyla, I would even say Brenda Way, KT Nelson, Tawnya, and Gary are pioneers. I can see those headlights, I just gotta pace myself so they don't fall out of sight?
What does the title have to do with this post? because I have been true to my word, No alcohol for the past 26 days, but after the coffee, I am ready for all three of these, Just like George... But not quite
Speaking of choices, The last time I had my own rendition of a BSB, I did not make good choices (I was 22) And here is that recipie... I think it's called a skittle... Please drink with caution...
(And if you want to help donate to DIT, just click the link on the side of my blog... please?)
Skittle mixed drink
3 count Raspberry Vodka
3 count Sierra Mist
1 count Orange Liquor
In that order, Serve over ice... Taste the rainbow.
ALSO: New friends (sorta) I love photos, and I had the pleasure of working with a fellow blogger recently... She takes GORGEOUS picture... and this is the link to her website! Happy browsing!
http://chubbphotos.blogspot.com/2010/08/natalie-q.html#comment-form
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
balance
It seems that whenever Life gets busy, I neglect writing. Today is the first day I have turned off the noise without completely going MIA.
Let me just say, good things are happening. A few months ago I thought I had found my dream job. And yet something was missing. Well, I'm back. I guess the part I was missing was reality.
I recently chatted with a friend about the pro's of going to an all girl school (which I did). The one thing I could really come up with is that, it puts priorities into a prospective. High school was NOT the end all be all, it wasn't reality completed, because their was one key ingredient missing: BOYS! Not to say that boys are life, but they are a part of it, just like art, and sports, and other things that i did in high school, NOT at high school. And when Work became my "reality", I kinda lost sight of that... BALANCE!!! It's about BALANCE! Work, School, Play. Or in my case, Work, Play, Family (now).
Speaking of balance, I was recently in my father's office and saw this 6 sided dye. On the sides were numbered priorites: 1) engineer, 2) Spouse, 3) father, 4) Participant, 5) Citizen, 6) Professional. But what caught my eye was the adjustment he had made to the 6 sided dye. My dad had taken a sharpie and re-wrote the top 3 priorities: 1) Spouse, 2) father, 3) Engineer.
This to me was CRAZY!
IF you know me and my dad's relationship (which most people don;t because you would need an hour and a bottle of red wine) you know we have had our ups and downs, and something about the dye made me feel like dad finally had figured it out... like all those years and dollars poured into therapy might have clicked. And I sometimes wonder if I had helped by being the terror I am/was.
So what is a Celebration drink? Personally, I think I have a TON of prosecco. I wish I knew a history, other than preRoman, HARDly distinguishable from asti's (the before dinner drink), I like it as much as Champagne. YUM! YUM YUM! I have a half a case of almond champagne in my house! Here's To balance! Can't wait for this experiment to be over!
Let me just say, good things are happening. A few months ago I thought I had found my dream job. And yet something was missing. Well, I'm back. I guess the part I was missing was reality.
I recently chatted with a friend about the pro's of going to an all girl school (which I did). The one thing I could really come up with is that, it puts priorities into a prospective. High school was NOT the end all be all, it wasn't reality completed, because their was one key ingredient missing: BOYS! Not to say that boys are life, but they are a part of it, just like art, and sports, and other things that i did in high school, NOT at high school. And when Work became my "reality", I kinda lost sight of that... BALANCE!!! It's about BALANCE! Work, School, Play. Or in my case, Work, Play, Family (now).
Speaking of balance, I was recently in my father's office and saw this 6 sided dye. On the sides were numbered priorites: 1) engineer, 2) Spouse, 3) father, 4) Participant, 5) Citizen, 6) Professional. But what caught my eye was the adjustment he had made to the 6 sided dye. My dad had taken a sharpie and re-wrote the top 3 priorities: 1) Spouse, 2) father, 3) Engineer.
This to me was CRAZY!
IF you know me and my dad's relationship (which most people don;t because you would need an hour and a bottle of red wine) you know we have had our ups and downs, and something about the dye made me feel like dad finally had figured it out... like all those years and dollars poured into therapy might have clicked. And I sometimes wonder if I had helped by being the terror I am/was.
So what is a Celebration drink? Personally, I think I have a TON of prosecco. I wish I knew a history, other than preRoman, HARDly distinguishable from asti's (the before dinner drink), I like it as much as Champagne. YUM! YUM YUM! I have a half a case of almond champagne in my house! Here's To balance! Can't wait for this experiment to be over!
Monday, August 9, 2010
Greens
and I'm not talking about money!
Recently, I have been reading a book from one of my favorite celebrity chefs about how to cook old world ITalian. Although it was a long, alcohol filled weekend (not on my end), I have been recently intrigued by the mystical plant known as basil... Plus there is a small thicket of it taking over my kitchen right now.
While I have yet to try this, I am intrigued by the thought of an unorthodox ingredient in a drink. This is the most appetizing mixture I could find.
It's called a Starry Lime:
Recently, I have been reading a book from one of my favorite celebrity chefs about how to cook old world ITalian. Although it was a long, alcohol filled weekend (not on my end), I have been recently intrigued by the mystical plant known as basil... Plus there is a small thicket of it taking over my kitchen right now.
While I have yet to try this, I am intrigued by the thought of an unorthodox ingredient in a drink. This is the most appetizing mixture I could find.
It's called a Starry Lime:
- 1 1/2 oz Van Gogh Wild Appel Vodka
- 1 oz Cranberry Juice
- 5 Basil Leaves, torn
- Juice of half a lime
- basil leaf for garnish
- Add Van Gogh Wild Appel Vodka, cranberry juice, basil and lime juice into a shaker filled with ice.
- Shake vigorously and strain into a rocks glass filled with ice.
- Garnish with a fresh basil leaf.
... Right? YUM!
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Day 4: Q... Nat Q.
Let's talk Politics a second.
GASP! I never talk politics (or religion) in public, because I have a cousin who told me "It can only end in screaming fits or tears" which I agree with.
I find it very disconcerting to be working retail in a place that I call "the row".
Tonight is wednesday, and while I was leaving work at 9:30, people, YOUNG people, were out, or coming out to the row in their gucci and Prada... What are these people doing for jobs? And how do I get hooked up in that field!!! Shoot.
Secondly, I am attempting to raise money to start an artistic revolution, and not only did I not get any backers today at ALL, but I work in a location where I saw (twice today at least) someone come in and spend an EXCESSIVE amount of money on pants only to have them altered.... into shorts.
We sell shorts. We are in a recession. Your excessive spending is TACKY! you do not need 8 pairs of pants. Their are not even 8 days in a week, and I am sure that somewhere between watching your dog and rewaxing your car your au pair has time to wash your expensive clothes!
... I need a drink.
But not from the Row! no no no! That would surely have cost me a fortune ($12) and I would still remember 8pants lady.
Who knows the drink of refinement only suited for the Row?
Enter Mister Bond... James Bond.
Like Hannibal Lector to Chianti, James Bond to the Martini... that's Shaken, not stirred. The MArtini has a long history to it also (I feel I could discuss it later, as it is one of my favorite mixed drinks and it could be addressed over the span of a week), the James bond martini is (gasp!) not the same as the original MArtini, which is not the same as my staple martini (grey goose lemon drop, sugar on the rim)
A Martini is simple, gin, vermouth, a green olive or lemon peel (depending how you feel), and 6 ice cubes... That's Right!
Also, let's talk about the glass... They are distinguished from other cocktail glasses by their sharply tapered bowl. The conical shape helps keep ingredients from separating, Some people say that the wide brim produces surface tension that helps bring out the gin's bouquet. Others believe it was developed to show off the olive or onion to best advantage. Conspiracy theorists suggest that necessity was the mother of invention when it came to wide brim cocktail glasses.
But, here it is, the James Bond martini (try and order it in a bar... I have yet to find someone who knows it well enough to give it to you in a champagne goblet, and also, it is VERY bitter. I'll stick with my lemony martini)
GASP! I never talk politics (or religion) in public, because I have a cousin who told me "It can only end in screaming fits or tears" which I agree with.
I find it very disconcerting to be working retail in a place that I call "the row".
Tonight is wednesday, and while I was leaving work at 9:30, people, YOUNG people, were out, or coming out to the row in their gucci and Prada... What are these people doing for jobs? And how do I get hooked up in that field!!! Shoot.
Secondly, I am attempting to raise money to start an artistic revolution, and not only did I not get any backers today at ALL, but I work in a location where I saw (twice today at least) someone come in and spend an EXCESSIVE amount of money on pants only to have them altered.... into shorts.
We sell shorts. We are in a recession. Your excessive spending is TACKY! you do not need 8 pairs of pants. Their are not even 8 days in a week, and I am sure that somewhere between watching your dog and rewaxing your car your au pair has time to wash your expensive clothes!
... I need a drink.
But not from the Row! no no no! That would surely have cost me a fortune ($12) and I would still remember 8pants lady.
Who knows the drink of refinement only suited for the Row?
Enter Mister Bond... James Bond.
Like Hannibal Lector to Chianti, James Bond to the Martini... that's Shaken, not stirred. The MArtini has a long history to it also (I feel I could discuss it later, as it is one of my favorite mixed drinks and it could be addressed over the span of a week), the James bond martini is (gasp!) not the same as the original MArtini, which is not the same as my staple martini (grey goose lemon drop, sugar on the rim)
A Martini is simple, gin, vermouth, a green olive or lemon peel (depending how you feel), and 6 ice cubes... That's Right!
Also, let's talk about the glass... They are distinguished from other cocktail glasses by their sharply tapered bowl. The conical shape helps keep ingredients from separating, Some people say that the wide brim produces surface tension that helps bring out the gin's bouquet. Others believe it was developed to show off the olive or onion to best advantage. Conspiracy theorists suggest that necessity was the mother of invention when it came to wide brim cocktail glasses.
But, here it is, the James Bond martini (try and order it in a bar... I have yet to find someone who knows it well enough to give it to you in a champagne goblet, and also, it is VERY bitter. I'll stick with my lemony martini)
Pour the gin, vodka and Lillet blanc into a cocktail shaker half-filled with cracked ice. Shake well, and strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Garnish with a twist of lemon, and serve.
Day three: Mint and gasoline.
SO yesterday was a full day and I thought alcohol wouldn't come up but surely it did!
To prove statistics are not just a bunch of phoney- baloney, My mom told someone about my project this month. They asked "WHY?" as if it were crazy to give up something... And then went onto say they couldn;t do it because of the social aspect.
What is it about this magical drink that makes it so crazy to give up. If I said I were gonna give up say, Red meat... or... carbs, I don;t think anyone these days would care to venture to ask more about it.. Dairy, red meat, carbs, sweets (we'll get to that in a few) everyone is ok. But, as soon as you say you are giving up alcohol everyone gets concerned... I'm just trying it out ok? Sheesh peeps, no worries I'm going back!
The conversation continued, and somehow we started talking about mint Juleps. I don;t know Much about this drink at all, not the way I know about red wine anyways, but I did some research and this is what I found out.
Mint Julep is a SUPER old drink. The comment that was made about mint Julep is that it "taste like gasoline". I looked at what it was made out of, and it looks like I found the answer: BOURBON! Now, I am not much of a bourbon drinker, and I think it probably cuz I haven't invested much time effort or money into finding a good one, but I can tell you this: cheap bourbon (and alcohol in general) tastes like gasoline. Mint Juleps are made of Bourbon, sugar, water, and mint... and that's all... so deceiving because if you ask me the word "Julep" is so pretty, I might order it just to say the word (if I were young and trashed). IT is also the staple drink of the KEntucky derby... figures.
Later yesterday, I went out to "da club" with my roommate to see a DJ friend of hers play (shout out to Don Lynch!). I wwent cuz I like to dance, but mostly because I wanted to see a club sober. I am not much of a clubber, and I sometimes wonder if I missed out in college.
I SO DID NOT! If last night was a look into my generation, I weep for the future. Not only did the drinks look crappy (BARTENDERS! EDUCATE YOURSELVES! IT'S ABOUT POUR COUNT!), but the "dancing" was appalling? And what do I have to compare it to? I have seen footage of clubs for previous generations, and our generation doesn't even hold a CANDLE to our Parents. Friends, go to our Parents house, bring them a bottle of their favorite Bourbon and put on some Ray charles.... AND TAKE NOTES!!! My parents can tear it up and I bet yours could to... ridiculous. But down your rubix cube's, step away from your computers, and learn to mix a drink and dance. it's about being well-rounded people.
I get the social aspect of it, I easily could have seen myself dropping close to $30 last night on drinks (It was hot, sweaty, I only knew one person, and I was in a club on a tuesday with overpriced drinks.) I would say I would have probably had 2-3 mixed drinks, plus tip for the tender... That's probably about 20-24 bucks.
Saved twenty bucks in my mind! I bought some fresh basil and italian parsley today with my savings... and enough pasta to hold me through winter... three drinks or a season's worth of pasta? Why didn't I give this up before?
To prove statistics are not just a bunch of phoney- baloney, My mom told someone about my project this month. They asked "WHY?" as if it were crazy to give up something... And then went onto say they couldn;t do it because of the social aspect.
What is it about this magical drink that makes it so crazy to give up. If I said I were gonna give up say, Red meat... or... carbs, I don;t think anyone these days would care to venture to ask more about it.. Dairy, red meat, carbs, sweets (we'll get to that in a few) everyone is ok. But, as soon as you say you are giving up alcohol everyone gets concerned... I'm just trying it out ok? Sheesh peeps, no worries I'm going back!
The conversation continued, and somehow we started talking about mint Juleps. I don;t know Much about this drink at all, not the way I know about red wine anyways, but I did some research and this is what I found out.
Mint Julep is a SUPER old drink. The comment that was made about mint Julep is that it "taste like gasoline". I looked at what it was made out of, and it looks like I found the answer: BOURBON! Now, I am not much of a bourbon drinker, and I think it probably cuz I haven't invested much time effort or money into finding a good one, but I can tell you this: cheap bourbon (and alcohol in general) tastes like gasoline. Mint Juleps are made of Bourbon, sugar, water, and mint... and that's all... so deceiving because if you ask me the word "Julep" is so pretty, I might order it just to say the word (if I were young and trashed). IT is also the staple drink of the KEntucky derby... figures.
Later yesterday, I went out to "da club" with my roommate to see a DJ friend of hers play (shout out to Don Lynch!). I wwent cuz I like to dance, but mostly because I wanted to see a club sober. I am not much of a clubber, and I sometimes wonder if I missed out in college.
I SO DID NOT! If last night was a look into my generation, I weep for the future. Not only did the drinks look crappy (BARTENDERS! EDUCATE YOURSELVES! IT'S ABOUT POUR COUNT!), but the "dancing" was appalling? And what do I have to compare it to? I have seen footage of clubs for previous generations, and our generation doesn't even hold a CANDLE to our Parents. Friends, go to our Parents house, bring them a bottle of their favorite Bourbon and put on some Ray charles.... AND TAKE NOTES!!! My parents can tear it up and I bet yours could to... ridiculous. But down your rubix cube's, step away from your computers, and learn to mix a drink and dance. it's about being well-rounded people.
I get the social aspect of it, I easily could have seen myself dropping close to $30 last night on drinks (It was hot, sweaty, I only knew one person, and I was in a club on a tuesday with overpriced drinks.) I would say I would have probably had 2-3 mixed drinks, plus tip for the tender... That's probably about 20-24 bucks.
Saved twenty bucks in my mind! I bought some fresh basil and italian parsley today with my savings... and enough pasta to hold me through winter... three drinks or a season's worth of pasta? Why didn't I give this up before?
Monday, August 2, 2010
Day two: Welcome to the world of Wine-o's
Alcohol is funny because of the taboos that go with it.
And like I imagined, this is harder than I first thought. I saw on someone's update today "it's not my fault I get off work at 2pm...therefore, no, it is not "too early" for a beer." It Made me chuckle because I can't even REMEMBER how many times I have resisted this thought. And I was doing great NOT drinking today until I saw my mom (around 8) and she offered me a glass of wine. Since it was chardonnay, it was easy to turn down, but only after she offered red and I almost yelled "NO!" at her. No, meaning "No, how dare you open a fresh bottle and drink it yourself knowing I won't have any!"
What is it about Red wine? The drink I know to be native to my people (both figuratively and literally), the purply-red syrup has been around since day one. My papa Q. drinks red wine every night with dinner, and my father kept a boxed wine (don't knock it, boxed wine is the BEST way to store wine, you snobs...) for as long as I can remember, following in this tradition. But Why? why??? Well, I can give you a million reasons, but like anything, it is to be drank in moderation (the benefits of red wine come from 2 to 3, 6-8 ounces, and 8 is a generous serving....)
For starters, scholarly journals (including but not limited to the university of Florida) show that, unlike most alcoholic beverages, red wine actually builds up the immune system instead of weakening it the way most do.
Nextly, the antioxidants in red wine have shown (by scholarly and drinking enthusiasts alike) to reduce Coronary heart disease, stress, blood clots, hypertension, kidney stones, and Alzheimer's disease.
Red wine has a HUGE extensive history of preparations and customs that go with it (that I can Divulge later). My personal favorite is a good bottle of Cabernet, but I just recently found a 2003 PEtite Syrah that has proven to be the most complex red wine I have ever drank (after first opening, it tasted of oak and chocolate... five minutes later, is that cherries??? 20 minutes of sitting, licorice? This is blowing my mind). There are books written as to how to pin point a "good" wine, but any Italian will tell you "its good if you like the taste". My sister the personal trainer went through a phase where all she wanted at the end of a long day was a bowl of popcorn and a glass of red wine (though I prefer chocolates or cheeses with mine... hence the pudge)..
Side note on pudge: part of the problem with alcohol is it makes you eat... water doesn't require cheese or chocolate. Beer and pretzels though? Wine and cheese? Martini and olives? all unnecessary!
Never drink your wine out of a metal glass, as the metal messes with the chemistry, turning your treat sour!
And I will say, after no drink for a good 48 hours, I was definitely sweating more in my hot yoga class than ever before (alcohols in general dehydrate you).
Salute!
And like I imagined, this is harder than I first thought. I saw on someone's update today "it's not my fault I get off work at 2pm...therefore, no, it is not "too early" for a beer." It Made me chuckle because I can't even REMEMBER how many times I have resisted this thought. And I was doing great NOT drinking today until I saw my mom (around 8) and she offered me a glass of wine. Since it was chardonnay, it was easy to turn down, but only after she offered red and I almost yelled "NO!" at her. No, meaning "No, how dare you open a fresh bottle and drink it yourself knowing I won't have any!"
What is it about Red wine? The drink I know to be native to my people (both figuratively and literally), the purply-red syrup has been around since day one. My papa Q. drinks red wine every night with dinner, and my father kept a boxed wine (don't knock it, boxed wine is the BEST way to store wine, you snobs...) for as long as I can remember, following in this tradition. But Why? why??? Well, I can give you a million reasons, but like anything, it is to be drank in moderation (the benefits of red wine come from 2 to 3, 6-8 ounces, and 8 is a generous serving....)
For starters, scholarly journals (including but not limited to the university of Florida) show that, unlike most alcoholic beverages, red wine actually builds up the immune system instead of weakening it the way most do.
Nextly, the antioxidants in red wine have shown (by scholarly and drinking enthusiasts alike) to reduce Coronary heart disease, stress, blood clots, hypertension, kidney stones, and Alzheimer's disease.
Red wine has a HUGE extensive history of preparations and customs that go with it (that I can Divulge later). My personal favorite is a good bottle of Cabernet, but I just recently found a 2003 PEtite Syrah that has proven to be the most complex red wine I have ever drank (after first opening, it tasted of oak and chocolate... five minutes later, is that cherries??? 20 minutes of sitting, licorice? This is blowing my mind). There are books written as to how to pin point a "good" wine, but any Italian will tell you "its good if you like the taste". My sister the personal trainer went through a phase where all she wanted at the end of a long day was a bowl of popcorn and a glass of red wine (though I prefer chocolates or cheeses with mine... hence the pudge)..
Side note on pudge: part of the problem with alcohol is it makes you eat... water doesn't require cheese or chocolate. Beer and pretzels though? Wine and cheese? Martini and olives? all unnecessary!
Never drink your wine out of a metal glass, as the metal messes with the chemistry, turning your treat sour!
And I will say, after no drink for a good 48 hours, I was definitely sweating more in my hot yoga class than ever before (alcohols in general dehydrate you).
Salute!
Sunday, August 1, 2010
AUGUST CHALLENGE:Alcohol
I think I have said before, I need goals.
Short term, disciplined, to the point goals. And I especially like when I can check things off my list.
It is for this reason that I am giving up alcohol for 30 days (33 to be exact).
Now, let's get one thing straight... I am not an alcoholic. I have never been an alcoholic, and have no real thoughts of becoming one anytime soon. I drink occasionally on the weekend, and Love red wine. SO why have I chosen this?
Well, here's why. Between weddings, fourth of July, and all of the wine festivals I have attended in the past month, I am starting to notice the some changes around my mid-section that I am not so found of! Plus there is not a whole lot about it that is good for you (Lie: Red wine is chocked full of anti-oxidants, and my family swears by it... but this i not what I have been drinking recently), and, point blank, it is just straight UP embarrassing to be in a hot yoga class and sweat the chardonnay from last night's dinner with Dad.
Plus, I am SUPER looking forward to a vacation at the end of the summer (labor Day weekend, to be exact) is going to mark the end of my drinking celibacy. I only came up with this idea a few days ago (in hot yoga) that I would give it up for all of august (and then some). It will be a challenge, mainly because when you say "don't think about alcohol" what is the first thing you think of? That's right. Plus, august will be hot, and Lemonade is so delicious with a little vodka in it :)
Let's set a few more ground rules: If i go out to a place where alcohol is present, I will tally an estimate in what I think I might have drank at the establishment, and be keeping a tally of what I save by NOT drinking. This money will go into my savings. Any drink I crave will be researched (no dissertations, just a quick summary), and in the event I lose weight, I will be weighing in every sunday. How's that for a project?
I googled "why do people drink alcohol?" and most of the hits from "studies" and informal polls say: for socializing. Hmmm... This makes sense, but I remember their being a time when it was not so hard to socialize without alcohol... so what makes it so magic? I hope to find out this august. I also plan on posting more alcohol related facts, traditions, or maybe even some recipes. The second most popular reason people drink (according to .com's and informal polls) is because they like the taste... which made me wonder who they were polling, because if it were 19-25 years olds as one site reported, I am calling shenanigans and tom-foolery right now on them! I did NOT like the taste of alcohol (except a good Cabernet) at 19.
TO reflect on the sociability aspect of it, let's talk about my last drink. Last night I went out to mexican food with my Dave and his Parents. It was Mexican food. And guess what I had? Yup. House margarita. If you know me you know I don't drink beer, so margarita is the next traditional drink of choice in American Establishments. I am not really a huge margarita drinker. I grew up on them and I think at family gatherings I got enough "tequila-ritas" (as we called them) before I was even 18, let alone 21. It is also for this reason that I am particular about my margartias.
This one was NO GOOD! Had I thought about it, it was maybe the worse Idea for a last drink. So why was a drinking it??? Sociability, baby! Don't get me wrong, Dave and his parents are great, but when the three of them get together, all they talk about is... airplanes. And not that I don't like airplanes, but don't breathe them the way they do. And all the jargon that goes on is like a different language. So.... sip sip sip! after you get almost to the bottom it is not so bad! And now I can not feel so bad for not keeping up with the conversation, because now my brain is moving pretty quickly through other notions... and it doesn't MATTER that I am in Natalie land... I have nothing to contribute to the airplane conversation anyways. I big bowl of tequila makes me socially acceptable.... and ready for bed!
Sidenote: If you are trying to lose weight, margaritas are the WORST way to go... One margarita (frozen) is in and around 250 calories!!!!! that is one that is 6ish oz.... NOT the FISHbowls they normally give you in restaurants... those are about 400... Just saying.
Cheers!
Short term, disciplined, to the point goals. And I especially like when I can check things off my list.
It is for this reason that I am giving up alcohol for 30 days (33 to be exact).
Now, let's get one thing straight... I am not an alcoholic. I have never been an alcoholic, and have no real thoughts of becoming one anytime soon. I drink occasionally on the weekend, and Love red wine. SO why have I chosen this?
Well, here's why. Between weddings, fourth of July, and all of the wine festivals I have attended in the past month, I am starting to notice the some changes around my mid-section that I am not so found of! Plus there is not a whole lot about it that is good for you (Lie: Red wine is chocked full of anti-oxidants, and my family swears by it... but this i not what I have been drinking recently), and, point blank, it is just straight UP embarrassing to be in a hot yoga class and sweat the chardonnay from last night's dinner with Dad.
Plus, I am SUPER looking forward to a vacation at the end of the summer (labor Day weekend, to be exact) is going to mark the end of my drinking celibacy. I only came up with this idea a few days ago (in hot yoga) that I would give it up for all of august (and then some). It will be a challenge, mainly because when you say "don't think about alcohol" what is the first thing you think of? That's right. Plus, august will be hot, and Lemonade is so delicious with a little vodka in it :)
Let's set a few more ground rules: If i go out to a place where alcohol is present, I will tally an estimate in what I think I might have drank at the establishment, and be keeping a tally of what I save by NOT drinking. This money will go into my savings. Any drink I crave will be researched (no dissertations, just a quick summary), and in the event I lose weight, I will be weighing in every sunday. How's that for a project?
I googled "why do people drink alcohol?" and most of the hits from "studies" and informal polls say: for socializing. Hmmm... This makes sense, but I remember their being a time when it was not so hard to socialize without alcohol... so what makes it so magic? I hope to find out this august. I also plan on posting more alcohol related facts, traditions, or maybe even some recipes. The second most popular reason people drink (according to .com's and informal polls) is because they like the taste... which made me wonder who they were polling, because if it were 19-25 years olds as one site reported, I am calling shenanigans and tom-foolery right now on them! I did NOT like the taste of alcohol (except a good Cabernet) at 19.
TO reflect on the sociability aspect of it, let's talk about my last drink. Last night I went out to mexican food with my Dave and his Parents. It was Mexican food. And guess what I had? Yup. House margarita. If you know me you know I don't drink beer, so margarita is the next traditional drink of choice in American Establishments. I am not really a huge margarita drinker. I grew up on them and I think at family gatherings I got enough "tequila-ritas" (as we called them) before I was even 18, let alone 21. It is also for this reason that I am particular about my margartias.
This one was NO GOOD! Had I thought about it, it was maybe the worse Idea for a last drink. So why was a drinking it??? Sociability, baby! Don't get me wrong, Dave and his parents are great, but when the three of them get together, all they talk about is... airplanes. And not that I don't like airplanes, but don't breathe them the way they do. And all the jargon that goes on is like a different language. So.... sip sip sip! after you get almost to the bottom it is not so bad! And now I can not feel so bad for not keeping up with the conversation, because now my brain is moving pretty quickly through other notions... and it doesn't MATTER that I am in Natalie land... I have nothing to contribute to the airplane conversation anyways. I big bowl of tequila makes me socially acceptable.... and ready for bed!
Sidenote: If you are trying to lose weight, margaritas are the WORST way to go... One margarita (frozen) is in and around 250 calories!!!!! that is one that is 6ish oz.... NOT the FISHbowls they normally give you in restaurants... those are about 400... Just saying.
Cheers!
Game, Set, Match!!!
Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and TODAY have been THE MOST GREATEST DAYS EVER!!!
Seriously. Things are working out.
While I would love to go back and tell in detail how I kicked off the best 3 day weekend of life, I'm afraid that today's descriptions of Thursday would not do it justice. Just know I was FLYING. It amazes me how people can work mundane jobs, while I would rather EARN my money. And that is how thursday felt. I EARNED It. Not just my Time their, but the prizes and great company I had that Followed. PLUS, Dance in Transit got approved on a fundraising website!
And if thursday was great, Friday was better. I went to Northern california to visit Dave's Parents, and while we were there we met some interesting people (sidenote: anyone know how to get a patent? thanks.) Plus we went into east Tahoe for some beach volleyball and swimming... What made this day for me I think though was the idea that I am getting back into shape... whether I want to think about it or not, The last two weeks of Hot yoga, and my feeble attempts at crossfit I could feel the benefit out on the volleyball court! It never amazes me what a little activity will do for you.
Now... If friday was great, Saturday rocked the HOUSE!!!! "Do one thing a day that scares you" is a school of thought widely practiced at work... sO I Went MOUNTAIN BIKING!!! For the first time ever! It was scary! and exhilerating!!! Like a wobbly rollercoaster almost! I was trying to be brave, but inside I was super nervous. And after four hours and only some minor injures (read: Road rash and bruised Left leg)... then it was a successful day! Plus I was in a BEAUTIFUL setting (kirkwood, ca) with AWESOME friends (B-rad & Dave) and at the end of the day we wandered over to the wildflower festival for an artwalk and some wine tasting... Sweating it up in the day, celebrate in the afternoon, good night sleep. I Lived the Dream!!!
Game. Set. Match.
Seriously. Things are working out.
While I would love to go back and tell in detail how I kicked off the best 3 day weekend of life, I'm afraid that today's descriptions of Thursday would not do it justice. Just know I was FLYING. It amazes me how people can work mundane jobs, while I would rather EARN my money. And that is how thursday felt. I EARNED It. Not just my Time their, but the prizes and great company I had that Followed. PLUS, Dance in Transit got approved on a fundraising website!
And if thursday was great, Friday was better. I went to Northern california to visit Dave's Parents, and while we were there we met some interesting people (sidenote: anyone know how to get a patent? thanks.) Plus we went into east Tahoe for some beach volleyball and swimming... What made this day for me I think though was the idea that I am getting back into shape... whether I want to think about it or not, The last two weeks of Hot yoga, and my feeble attempts at crossfit I could feel the benefit out on the volleyball court! It never amazes me what a little activity will do for you.
Now... If friday was great, Saturday rocked the HOUSE!!!! "Do one thing a day that scares you" is a school of thought widely practiced at work... sO I Went MOUNTAIN BIKING!!! For the first time ever! It was scary! and exhilerating!!! Like a wobbly rollercoaster almost! I was trying to be brave, but inside I was super nervous. And after four hours and only some minor injures (read: Road rash and bruised Left leg)... then it was a successful day! Plus I was in a BEAUTIFUL setting (kirkwood, ca) with AWESOME friends (B-rad & Dave) and at the end of the day we wandered over to the wildflower festival for an artwalk and some wine tasting... Sweating it up in the day, celebrate in the afternoon, good night sleep. I Lived the Dream!!!
Game. Set. Match.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
The sweet nothings...
Contradictory at it's finest.
Today was the first day for a while that I have had nothing planned. If you looked into my calendar... it was blank.
Most people get excited at the prospect of nothing on their Calendar.
Not me.
I feel my throat close, and I get dizzy and I feel as though my head might explode!
Hello. My name is Natalie Quilici, and I am 24 years old.... And I am a workaholic.
But today, I have put myself through a mental test of strength and discipline. I have made myself do nothing.
It actually hasn't turned out so bad...
I have been told that Italians are supposed to be known for "l’arte non fare niente", the art of doing jack squat. I also know my Grandfather whom I look up to wasted no time working hard so that I could have all the nice things that I do and I'll be damned to waste his hard efforts on "nothing". So I tried it. And the problem was, I don't like it. I am trying really hard to Live in the now, and be happy with the life I AM living, but the truth is I spend a lot of time drawing up my master plan to NOT do that.
So what does a workaholic do when they are making themselves do nothing.
Well... they get in their cars and go outside. They spend hours wandering a bookstore, looking at all the books, reading sections that look interesting. I can't even believe HOW much time I spent today reading from different books on what I need to have a successful career (3 hours I think???? maybe 4) I often found myself screaming in my head WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?! YOU NEED TO MAKE A MILLION BY THE TIME YOU ARE 33!!! GO HOME AND START LOOKING FOR BETTER JOBS
That voice has finally gotten irritating. I remember reading in a book (not today, a few years ago) That the work of the devil is not necessarily doing something right or wrong, but more over wasting your time... So I have decided the new game plan is to do... nothing...
But not nothing. Instead of looking for something better... I will do my BEST with what I have, and wait for better to come to ME.
I have never been good with passive looking, but it always seems that when I stop looking so hard, opportunity knocks in abundance... Funny. I seem to recall going through this at 20... swearing off boys and focusing on art, and when I became stable and comfortable with being me... in walked someone who also liked me (almost as much as I like me!) And while I have made many discoveries about myself, The common thread to my "unluck" in frantic job hunting, is me. And so I am taking on a new strategy.
What else did I learn today. I try not to make assumptions based on first impressions. Everyone does it, but I really try to give a person two or three days of ignorant sayings before I start writing them off... with at LEAST one opportunity to say I'm sorry...
SO I have decided, with the encouragement of a new friend and my desire to talk to someone today (not including my roommate or boyfriend, they are more like extensions of me), and against everything I have already learned about this class... I will return reluctantly to crossfit. Because I truly believe everyone/thing deserves a second chance... Plus if it doesn't go as planned, I can always go back to my new addiction for hot yoga tomorrow...
Wish me luck!
Today was the first day for a while that I have had nothing planned. If you looked into my calendar... it was blank.
Most people get excited at the prospect of nothing on their Calendar.
Not me.
I feel my throat close, and I get dizzy and I feel as though my head might explode!
Hello. My name is Natalie Quilici, and I am 24 years old.... And I am a workaholic.
But today, I have put myself through a mental test of strength and discipline. I have made myself do nothing.
It actually hasn't turned out so bad...
I have been told that Italians are supposed to be known for "l’arte non fare niente", the art of doing jack squat. I also know my Grandfather whom I look up to wasted no time working hard so that I could have all the nice things that I do and I'll be damned to waste his hard efforts on "nothing". So I tried it. And the problem was, I don't like it. I am trying really hard to Live in the now, and be happy with the life I AM living, but the truth is I spend a lot of time drawing up my master plan to NOT do that.
So what does a workaholic do when they are making themselves do nothing.
Well... they get in their cars and go outside. They spend hours wandering a bookstore, looking at all the books, reading sections that look interesting. I can't even believe HOW much time I spent today reading from different books on what I need to have a successful career (3 hours I think???? maybe 4) I often found myself screaming in my head WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?! YOU NEED TO MAKE A MILLION BY THE TIME YOU ARE 33!!! GO HOME AND START LOOKING FOR BETTER JOBS
That voice has finally gotten irritating. I remember reading in a book (not today, a few years ago) That the work of the devil is not necessarily doing something right or wrong, but more over wasting your time... So I have decided the new game plan is to do... nothing...
But not nothing. Instead of looking for something better... I will do my BEST with what I have, and wait for better to come to ME.
I have never been good with passive looking, but it always seems that when I stop looking so hard, opportunity knocks in abundance... Funny. I seem to recall going through this at 20... swearing off boys and focusing on art, and when I became stable and comfortable with being me... in walked someone who also liked me (almost as much as I like me!) And while I have made many discoveries about myself, The common thread to my "unluck" in frantic job hunting, is me. And so I am taking on a new strategy.
What else did I learn today. I try not to make assumptions based on first impressions. Everyone does it, but I really try to give a person two or three days of ignorant sayings before I start writing them off... with at LEAST one opportunity to say I'm sorry...
SO I have decided, with the encouragement of a new friend and my desire to talk to someone today (not including my roommate or boyfriend, they are more like extensions of me), and against everything I have already learned about this class... I will return reluctantly to crossfit. Because I truly believe everyone/thing deserves a second chance... Plus if it doesn't go as planned, I can always go back to my new addiction for hot yoga tomorrow...
Wish me luck!
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Art Both Past and Future
Art transcends me. It is bigger than me, and its importance is true, and that is why I write about it with such ferocity.
There is hope for San Jose.
My friend invited me out to a trunk show opening of a place on the Alameda. The store is called "The usuals" and it was anything but usual. A small studio, it was a place for local artist, and I turned green with envy at the way this event was set up.
First, it was a trunk show for local San Jose artists work. And by artists, I mean jewelry and clothing design. Secondly, on the walls a photographer had hung his work, also for sale, and during the fashion show a local artist was performing, while aspiring models showed off clothes, and a local up and coming food cart provided some tasty treats... all 100% San Jose business...
Talk about the Diaghilev of fashion world!
The space was just right for the Venue, and more importantly than that, the products were cute, reasonably priced, and ranged from avaunt guard to timeless. I made a new friend (a jewelry designer) whom I almost started to tell about how stoked I was San Jose finally starting to do things... but I stopped myself to keep myself from sounding like a complete blathering idiot. However, my new friend was the owner of her own jewelry designs, and her work is super cute and again, reasonably priced, and you should probably look up her website HERE.
ALSO, to push my point even further (about San Jose Local things and Art). I took Boyfriend to the Rosicrucian Museum yesterday (and the planetarium). I forgot when the last time I had been there was, how awesome it is, and that, unbeknown to many CHILDREN my own age.... San Jose has some really cool stuff in it (if everyone would just open there eyes and stop complaining about what we don't have and that we aren't San Francisco). AND While I was there, The Egyptian tombs reminded me that art was used to transcend us then also. When people were buried in pyramids, and living family members had to leave them food and goods to take over into the afterlife, they would PAINT on the walls what needed to go with them. Murals were created to show the happy deceased in paradise with all his favorite things.
But stepping back what does this mean? They were right? no. There religion was better? No. It simply means that they APPRECIATED art. How do I know this, well, for starters, if it was common for this mural to be made, it meant everyone (or a good majority) could PAINT. It meant when someone said, "aunt Mildred has passed, let's make a mural in her honor", no one gulped, started to sweat and stammered about how they can't, their pictures looked like stick figures and they wouldn't do it or couldn't do it...
Those Egyptians didn't realize what they were taking for granted.
There is hope for San Jose.
My friend invited me out to a trunk show opening of a place on the Alameda. The store is called "The usuals" and it was anything but usual. A small studio, it was a place for local artist, and I turned green with envy at the way this event was set up.
First, it was a trunk show for local San Jose artists work. And by artists, I mean jewelry and clothing design. Secondly, on the walls a photographer had hung his work, also for sale, and during the fashion show a local artist was performing, while aspiring models showed off clothes, and a local up and coming food cart provided some tasty treats... all 100% San Jose business...
Talk about the Diaghilev of fashion world!
The space was just right for the Venue, and more importantly than that, the products were cute, reasonably priced, and ranged from avaunt guard to timeless. I made a new friend (a jewelry designer) whom I almost started to tell about how stoked I was San Jose finally starting to do things... but I stopped myself to keep myself from sounding like a complete blathering idiot. However, my new friend was the owner of her own jewelry designs, and her work is super cute and again, reasonably priced, and you should probably look up her website HERE.
ALSO, to push my point even further (about San Jose Local things and Art). I took Boyfriend to the Rosicrucian Museum yesterday (and the planetarium). I forgot when the last time I had been there was, how awesome it is, and that, unbeknown to many CHILDREN my own age.... San Jose has some really cool stuff in it (if everyone would just open there eyes and stop complaining about what we don't have and that we aren't San Francisco). AND While I was there, The Egyptian tombs reminded me that art was used to transcend us then also. When people were buried in pyramids, and living family members had to leave them food and goods to take over into the afterlife, they would PAINT on the walls what needed to go with them. Murals were created to show the happy deceased in paradise with all his favorite things.
But stepping back what does this mean? They were right? no. There religion was better? No. It simply means that they APPRECIATED art. How do I know this, well, for starters, if it was common for this mural to be made, it meant everyone (or a good majority) could PAINT. It meant when someone said, "aunt Mildred has passed, let's make a mural in her honor", no one gulped, started to sweat and stammered about how they can't, their pictures looked like stick figures and they wouldn't do it or couldn't do it...
Those Egyptians didn't realize what they were taking for granted.
Thursday needs some talk
Hello! Thursday was jam packed, and actually so was the rest of this weekend, but Thursday in itself needs Some talk to be had....
First of all, i Finished Training at my new job, and I must say.... I am WAY addicted to "warm Yoga". Not too be confused with Bikram (the Original Hot yoga) Warm yoga has the room heated to a bareable Temperature (80 something as opposed to 102) and you do a flow class in the heat. It is like getting a facial for your whole body. Once you surrender yourself to to the heat, and just embrace the sweat, it feels AMAZING!!! My one complaint is that, of course like in a facial, the next day my face was freaking out because all the toxins had been brought to the surface. BUT, better out than in I think!
Next, after warm yoga, I got a call from Our friends working with us in Dance In Transit. We are raring to go!. We have 3 green lights, and Will be hosting the festival September 18th & 19th... MARK your calendar.
My one request from readers, is to please, please, PLEASE! start advertising word of mouth. Tell you families and friends about Dance, and Art. And Also, on top of that, we are looking to advertise, but as many of you know, I have just graduated, and while I pride myself on making something of nothing, sponsorships would be GREATLY appreciated... So we can 1) do it again next year and 2) keep it as cheap for the public as possible.
Our budget for the weekend isn't huge, and we would give credit (a logo of the business, a shout out, possibly DANCE in Transit memrobelia) to anyone who could find the finances to help us. It wouldn't even be too much if split amoungst a few benefactors. Please e-mail me if you want to see our proposal! We need a big gun!
First of all, i Finished Training at my new job, and I must say.... I am WAY addicted to "warm Yoga". Not too be confused with Bikram (the Original Hot yoga) Warm yoga has the room heated to a bareable Temperature (80 something as opposed to 102) and you do a flow class in the heat. It is like getting a facial for your whole body. Once you surrender yourself to to the heat, and just embrace the sweat, it feels AMAZING!!! My one complaint is that, of course like in a facial, the next day my face was freaking out because all the toxins had been brought to the surface. BUT, better out than in I think!
Next, after warm yoga, I got a call from Our friends working with us in Dance In Transit. We are raring to go!. We have 3 green lights, and Will be hosting the festival September 18th & 19th... MARK your calendar.
My one request from readers, is to please, please, PLEASE! start advertising word of mouth. Tell you families and friends about Dance, and Art. And Also, on top of that, we are looking to advertise, but as many of you know, I have just graduated, and while I pride myself on making something of nothing, sponsorships would be GREATLY appreciated... So we can 1) do it again next year and 2) keep it as cheap for the public as possible.
Our budget for the weekend isn't huge, and we would give credit (a logo of the business, a shout out, possibly DANCE in Transit memrobelia) to anyone who could find the finances to help us. It wouldn't even be too much if split amoungst a few benefactors. Please e-mail me if you want to see our proposal! We need a big gun!
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Purpose
PURPOSE/ IT'S THAT LITTLE FLAME/ THAT LIGHTS A FIRE/ UNDER YOUR ASS.
PURPOSE/ IT KEEPS YOU GOING STRONG/ LIKE A CAR WITH A FULL TANK OF GAS.
I was talking to my cousin last night. I always find it interesting to talk to him because, I come from a family of engineers who love and support me, Anthony, being another artist (Sax Musician by trade, Hodge podge of artistic wizardery by passion) GETS me.
We were talking about goals (mine, specifically) and he said something that I hope to never forget. I have been graduated San Jose State for almost 7 months now, and have been Aching, Craving, DYING for stability so badly that yesterday I contemplated (gasp!) going back to get a master's... I was telling him my master plot and where I eventually want to be and he said to me, "well... Here's the positive about that. You haven't yet given up. Most people at your point, roll over, lock there dreams away, and join the rat race..."
When I read these words (did I say talking? I meant FB chatting...) A lump came to my throat, and my tears welled up and I felt my palms start to sweat with panic. I was there. I was feeling my dreams not being put into a closet by choice, they were being taken out of my hand. And I was standing on the line. I was looking at Mr. Monotony in the face, and he was extending his hand out to me. He looks kind, and safe. And he was reaching, reaching for my outstretched palm that held my hopes and dreams, reaching....
"... but you haven't done that. I remember when it happened to me. But you haven't lost sight of that, kiddo. And knowing what your ultimate goal is and taking the baby steps to get there makes me think you won't lose sight of that. You'll make it, Kiddo, you're doing fine."
And these words made me close my fist tight, turn around, and run like hell from the face that, deceivingly looks safe, but upon further inspection is mediocrity and boredom. And as I was running, nay sprinting away from the crossroads and mister monotony, I glanced over my shoulder and saw 12 year old me, tap dancing on my dad's hardwood floors til I was exhausted to master a single footed wing step. And I saw 16 year old me, choosing the dance team over my varsity softball position. And I saw 18 year old me, Dancing like no one was watching for a spot in Irvine's dance program.
... Who am I kidding? I'm not safe. And I never have been.
Again, let me clarify, I have a complete and full respect for people who are in corporate America. I respect them because they do something I know I never could do. And I would not MIND a job in an office with a set schedule that gave me nights and weekends...
.... but this is only so I could live off Ramen for 3 years, save the money I was making during the day, and become a super hero at night, creating, dancing, budgeting, for the ultimate goal, which is something that exists outside corporate America.
I am so glad I have my cousin, mentors, family & friends who continue to love, support, and encourage me. They are really what is keeping me motivated toward my purpose.
"And I'd gladly go down in a flame if a flame's what it takes to remember my name"
PURPOSE/ IT KEEPS YOU GOING STRONG/ LIKE A CAR WITH A FULL TANK OF GAS.
I was talking to my cousin last night. I always find it interesting to talk to him because, I come from a family of engineers who love and support me, Anthony, being another artist (Sax Musician by trade, Hodge podge of artistic wizardery by passion) GETS me.
We were talking about goals (mine, specifically) and he said something that I hope to never forget. I have been graduated San Jose State for almost 7 months now, and have been Aching, Craving, DYING for stability so badly that yesterday I contemplated (gasp!) going back to get a master's... I was telling him my master plot and where I eventually want to be and he said to me, "well... Here's the positive about that. You haven't yet given up. Most people at your point, roll over, lock there dreams away, and join the rat race..."
When I read these words (did I say talking? I meant FB chatting...) A lump came to my throat, and my tears welled up and I felt my palms start to sweat with panic. I was there. I was feeling my dreams not being put into a closet by choice, they were being taken out of my hand. And I was standing on the line. I was looking at Mr. Monotony in the face, and he was extending his hand out to me. He looks kind, and safe. And he was reaching, reaching for my outstretched palm that held my hopes and dreams, reaching....
"... but you haven't done that. I remember when it happened to me. But you haven't lost sight of that, kiddo. And knowing what your ultimate goal is and taking the baby steps to get there makes me think you won't lose sight of that. You'll make it, Kiddo, you're doing fine."
And these words made me close my fist tight, turn around, and run like hell from the face that, deceivingly looks safe, but upon further inspection is mediocrity and boredom. And as I was running, nay sprinting away from the crossroads and mister monotony, I glanced over my shoulder and saw 12 year old me, tap dancing on my dad's hardwood floors til I was exhausted to master a single footed wing step. And I saw 16 year old me, choosing the dance team over my varsity softball position. And I saw 18 year old me, Dancing like no one was watching for a spot in Irvine's dance program.
... Who am I kidding? I'm not safe. And I never have been.
Again, let me clarify, I have a complete and full respect for people who are in corporate America. I respect them because they do something I know I never could do. And I would not MIND a job in an office with a set schedule that gave me nights and weekends...
.... but this is only so I could live off Ramen for 3 years, save the money I was making during the day, and become a super hero at night, creating, dancing, budgeting, for the ultimate goal, which is something that exists outside corporate America.
I am so glad I have my cousin, mentors, family & friends who continue to love, support, and encourage me. They are really what is keeping me motivated toward my purpose.
"And I'd gladly go down in a flame if a flame's what it takes to remember my name"
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Mastering the art of Pain
So... On my second day of work, I went to The Dailey Method in Saratoga... AND WAS THE BIGGEST BABY!!! The problem was I went balls to the wall during crossfit, and could hardly WALK to work let alone go through a whole class.
However, I feel like there is a class etiquette that I finally found explained.
Crossfit is a lot about Olympic weight lifting, and I feel there is a stigma that goes with it. The grunting and straining in lifting, I get it. You think you need it. Just BREATHE! All that grunting and straining... unnecessary. It does not work like the woman's tennis open (and that doesn't work either.)
Now, on the FLIP side to that, Dailey method is a workout based on small contractions to make lean, long muscles. They use straps and barres, and it originates from ballet and pilates workouts.
So, you can imagine my distaste when I could hear moaning and groaning from a participant about her Dailey Method workout. At first, I wanted to blame this on the early time and my lack of orange juice this morning (a sacrificed my breakfast for 10 minutes of sleep... and I still believe my priorities were aligned correctly) And then it hit me: No. No Natalie, you are not being judgmental and pretentious.
This is what I think: The straining. So you are lifting more than your body weight over your head. Ok, it's hard.
Now try and Balance all of your body weight on the two centimeters square footage of your toe. Oh wait, and while you do it, where the most uncomfortable article of clothing. You probably have a wedgie. You are probably also wearing a cake layer of makeup. And keep your head up, which is, by the way, about 2 pounds heavier than normal because of all the hairspray, pins, and sparkly Tiara.
Grunting? No. Straining? out of the question.... Instead you have to SMILE and make it look easy.
Olympic Lifting? Sure, it's hard. There's no question about it. But... While cross fit was hard, I remember dancing a 3 part, 27 minute ballet suite, making me more sore than crossfit.
And I looked way better doing it.
And this morning in Dailey Method... sure I wanted to die... but while I was in class... Ya couldn't tell :)
However, I feel like there is a class etiquette that I finally found explained.
Crossfit is a lot about Olympic weight lifting, and I feel there is a stigma that goes with it. The grunting and straining in lifting, I get it. You think you need it. Just BREATHE! All that grunting and straining... unnecessary. It does not work like the woman's tennis open (and that doesn't work either.)
Now, on the FLIP side to that, Dailey method is a workout based on small contractions to make lean, long muscles. They use straps and barres, and it originates from ballet and pilates workouts.
So, you can imagine my distaste when I could hear moaning and groaning from a participant about her Dailey Method workout. At first, I wanted to blame this on the early time and my lack of orange juice this morning (a sacrificed my breakfast for 10 minutes of sleep... and I still believe my priorities were aligned correctly) And then it hit me: No. No Natalie, you are not being judgmental and pretentious.
This is what I think: The straining. So you are lifting more than your body weight over your head. Ok, it's hard.
Now try and Balance all of your body weight on the two centimeters square footage of your toe. Oh wait, and while you do it, where the most uncomfortable article of clothing. You probably have a wedgie. You are probably also wearing a cake layer of makeup. And keep your head up, which is, by the way, about 2 pounds heavier than normal because of all the hairspray, pins, and sparkly Tiara.
Grunting? No. Straining? out of the question.... Instead you have to SMILE and make it look easy.
Olympic Lifting? Sure, it's hard. There's no question about it. But... While cross fit was hard, I remember dancing a 3 part, 27 minute ballet suite, making me more sore than crossfit.
And I looked way better doing it.
And this morning in Dailey Method... sure I wanted to die... but while I was in class... Ya couldn't tell :)
Monday, July 19, 2010
Jump in!
That's how I feel about today. After weeks of searching I am back, in what seems to be another week of training. I have decided this is a great experience because I am learning more about fitness (on only the first day!) than I could have financially had the opportunity to do.
Today I went to a cross fit class. I have never been to one, and have heard both extreme thoughts on the workout, but I tried to go into it with an open mind. I can already tell I am going to be sore tomorrow. Not only will I be sore, I may not stand. It kicked my butt, and I loathe the thought of getting out of bed in the morning. don't get me wrong, I know it was just what I needed to have my butt jump-started off the couch, but looking back on it I can say I know now it just wasn't for me.
In other news, I am still waiting to here a final say about Dance in Transit, and my brain is so mush from my first day of training that I litereally spent 2 hour playing wii with my brother in law today.
Like my cousin Ashley, I am now starting to count the days til Labor day weekend. I feel like, even though I was unemployed for 3 weeks, I need a vacation. One unburdened by money woes, lingering thoughts of self-doubt, and inferiority.
Also, I am trying to write everyday. Being unemployed kept me busy at work, and I am hoping to keep writing... Even through the exhaustion and mushy brain.
....But this is all I can muster today.
Today I went to a cross fit class. I have never been to one, and have heard both extreme thoughts on the workout, but I tried to go into it with an open mind. I can already tell I am going to be sore tomorrow. Not only will I be sore, I may not stand. It kicked my butt, and I loathe the thought of getting out of bed in the morning. don't get me wrong, I know it was just what I needed to have my butt jump-started off the couch, but looking back on it I can say I know now it just wasn't for me.
In other news, I am still waiting to here a final say about Dance in Transit, and my brain is so mush from my first day of training that I litereally spent 2 hour playing wii with my brother in law today.
Like my cousin Ashley, I am now starting to count the days til Labor day weekend. I feel like, even though I was unemployed for 3 weeks, I need a vacation. One unburdened by money woes, lingering thoughts of self-doubt, and inferiority.
Also, I am trying to write everyday. Being unemployed kept me busy at work, and I am hoping to keep writing... Even through the exhaustion and mushy brain.
....But this is all I can muster today.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)